And Then Austin Fell Off My Roof…

This past week was a rough one.  My wisdom teeth have not let up and i’ve been kinda grumpy…lets not lie.  Tomorrow is the day to get the low down on when and where they’ll be coming out though and due to my rocky past with dentist and such i’m not looking forward to it in the slightest.  This is why i spent most of the weekend trying to relax, busy myself and all around distract me from thinking about it or the pain in general.

After a night on the town Friday night, Ashley/my roommate/bff and i were getting ready to get some sun Saturday, on our roof.  Now, we’ve been on the roof before, never to lay out but to actually inspect it, clear off branches, hang Christmas lights etc.  Always with the upmost caution and always completing the trip unharmed, so laying out  seemed perfectly normal and an all around good idea…i mean my mom did it when she was our age.  So we get our base camp set up, blanket, towels, ipod and speakers, reading material, cell phone …in case we do need help…we forgot water.   

A good 15min into this Austin says he’s stopping by Sonic and then coming by the house.  Ash and i put in our request for a strawberry slush and ocean water and tell him we’re on the roof.  All is well, or was it.  Austin is heading up the ladder and successfully hands us our drinks and right now i can’t remember what he was even talking about because just as i squat down to grab his hand for counter balance he lost his footing and almost in slow motion falls down the ladder…. that’s 6ft folks!  

At this point i stand up and cannot believe what just happened.  Now, sometimes when things are horrific, awkward, unbelievable i get that inappropriate reaction of laughter.  As i do my best to suppress this i expect to see Austin get up and make some sarcastic comment, joke, at least let out a few good curses….nope i look over the edge only to see his aviators lying on the ground and then he says, “i think i broke my wrist” but i heard rib.  After watching him walk around swinging the arm in question frantically we finally get Julio to come over and help us off the roof and get the now pale faced Austin to sit down.  Oh it was broken.

We jump in the car and drive to the closest hospital, St. Davids.  Now, before i go on, i warn you my review of the hospital and staff are not favorable and you may want to reconsider if that is where you go when in the state of emergency.  

First off the waiting room was a little warm for a hospital, meaning whatever germs that were living there were most definitely breading.  The wait wasn’t bad and as soon as we got him admitted the doctor was in the examination room almost right away.  Then the wait began.  The first nurse took his vitals then told me i was being mean to him, so obviously i already had her on my list, i was just teasing him to make him forget about the pain, oh and the fact that they wouldn’t clean up any of the other open fleshy wounds!  Then about 15-20min later we have “milk is awesome’/”that hard level on super smash brothers” come in and “clean” the aforementioned wounds.  Yeah, clean if you consider using the biohazard bin as a table, touching the counter, wall and trash can areas of the room with your “sterile gloves” then putting antibiotic ointment on Austin’s open cuts with the same gloves clean, then we witnessed the epitome of cleanliness.  This all while she tells us she would love to break her hand so she could opt out of her O’Chem final.  Then they try to splint his arm without an x-ray…oh that’s because the order for the x-ray got lost!  10-15min later they bring by the machine, insert joke about Austin and Kanye glowing in the dark together, and we wait some more.  Then what we hoped would be a Dr. O’ Malley turned out to be intern from idiotsville, who even though he just took the “how to splint” class couldn’t freakin’ remember the steps.  So, i realize at this point i’m being pissy because i feel like we have been given the med school rejects so i try to give him the benefit of the doubt, but “milk lady” comes back stating, “well i have some time to kill,….i’ll just watch”  Ummm k.  Well then “milk” and “idiot” start to talk very loudly about how “idiot” has already messed up and how they were taught different and how “milk” would have done it …blah blah blah SHUT UP!  Austin is being a very good sport about the whole thing, i’m not sure if it’s because the drugs kicked in or because he knew they wouldn’t get it even if he did say something about their lack of knowledge and/or bedside manner.  Then the nurse who thinks i’m a jerk comes back in to discharge him, without the doctor checking him out….so we send her away and ask the doctor to have a look, which he does in a very half ass way and then about 15min later jerky the nurseface comes back in to check vitals and sign him out….and it took her so damn long because she was “charting real quick” before she headed back.  AGH!   But hey, they validated are parking, that’s something right.  

In retrospect, this will be a great story to tell in a few years when the wounds have healed and we find out “milk” failed O’Chem and “idiot” finally learned to splint something on his own.  As for the nurse….well she’ll still be charting.  For now, please, i urge you to drive the extra 10-15min to Brackenridge….i mean you’ll be waiting for someone to come clean your lacerations or “lats” as “milk” called them if you were at St. David’s.  Austin, i’m so sorry.  Ash and i feel horrible still and we’ll be with you to see the specialist if you need us…hey it might be another adventure.  Next up, the dentist.  ugh.

~ by mprint on May 5, 2008.